Time out

We have been doing 'Time Out' now with Jamie for about a month with mixed results. She feels she should be able to do what she wants whenever she wants. She does this tearless cry/shout/whine whenever she is dissuaded from something she wants to do. Examples include picking her up from daycare, taking a phone, or keys or other forbidden object from her once she has grabbed it, and transitions in general like when putting her in 'her pen' in the living room even when we are going in too, or taking her up to change her etc.

Anyway we only use 'Time Out' for when she is really doing something willful. Like playing with the phone as she knows better. First we give her a warning, 'Don't touch the phone' then if she continues the behavior we put her in 'Time Out'. As we sit her down we tell her 'You didn't listen to mommy and played with the phone.' She cries bloody murder then, no fakeness about it at this point - tears and everything. I dont understand how we will ever put her there and leave her, as you can see we have to hold her down.